patronuses:

He slips into the elevator just as it closes, and he breaks at the sight of her red-rimmed eyes. She sniffles, and in response, his chest clenches in physical pain. He struggles to keep his emotions in check because the small elevator makes everything seem so much harder to run away from. In fact, he can’t run away at all. The weight of the air is suffocating him, and he stares at the top of the elevator door with a tight jaw, trying to steel himself for what is to come. He waits for her to start speaking because this isn’t about him at all.

She breathes loudly, and he winces because he isn’t expecting her to be this broken. Not like this. Not at all.

He exhales noisily through his nose in an attempt to dispel the rising uncertainty in him with no avail, and her voice breaks through the hum of the elevators, hoarse and heart-wrenching, so much unlike the her he has grown fond of, “There is always another monster.”

He presses his lips together as a sharp stab of pain hits him square in the chest and knocks him breathless. He’s mumbling in return because he’s unable to manage anything more, “Yeah.”

“I mean, we pursue them, but we just keep making targets of ourselves.”

He finally turns to face her and isn’t surprised at all when he sees that she’s not looking at him. His eyes devour the profile of her face, and he wants to do something, anything, to comfort her. He almost reaches out to touch her because she’s broken, so broken, and it makes him die inside. He wants to pick up the pieces.

He takes an involuntary step forward, and his voice doesn’t sound like his at all when he tells her roughly, “Better us than someone who didn’t sign up for it.”

Her gaze falls to the floor before she inhales sharply and looks up at him.

Blood-shot and churning with emotion, her eyes meet his with a desperate edge to them. Strands of her hair fall from her loosely-done bun, all of her makeup has been scrubbed away, and he fully realizes in that moment that this is her - raw, unguarded, completely honest and open behind the security of the closed elevator doors.

Honest with him.

This makes him hold his breath, and she murmurs with honesty shining in her eyes and her voice cracking, “I don’t think I can take it anymore.”

She doesn’t look away from him, and she expects something - and for the first time in years, he knows exactly what to do. Instinct overcomes him, and he can feel the hurt rising in his eyes when he reaches out to pull her close. An arm snakes around her waist while she steps into his embrace willingly, her head finding an unfamiliar kook against the side of his neck.

He swallows hard.

“Hey,” he says softly, and she pulls back far enough to look at his face. He keeps a hold around her, and she’s close now. He takes in the sight of her and can see her watery eyes and trembling lip, and he realizes that she is making no effort to control it. That’s enough to make him want to squeeze his eyes shut in agony, but he forces himself to stay in control, simply hoping with everything that he has that she knows how much he cares about her. He rubs his hand against the small of her back.

“We’re gonna get him,” his voice breaks despite himself and drops to a whisper, “okay?”

Her eyes instantly fill with more tears. God, she’s about to cry, and it makes alarm and concern jump into his throat and stop his breathing and before he even registers what he’s doing, he raises a hand up to her face. He’s never touched her like this before, and he thinks about nothing except trying to soothe her when he touches the back of his hand to her cheek and brushes her skin with the lightest of touches.

He lets his hand drop, and she looks like she’s about to say something more when the elevator dings open and the moment is lost.

I.LOVE.THIS.♥

I CAN’T EVEN.